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CULTURAL
FAUX PAS
1. An
American official handed out bright green baseball caps at every stop
without noticing that none of the men would put them on or that all the
women were giggling. Finally,
a Chinese-American in the delegation took the man aside and informed him
that "to wear a green hat" is the Chinese symbol of a cuckold (a
man whose wife is unfaithful).
2. Mocking a man's masculinity
is only one of the inadvertent slights towards the Chinese.
3. Stabbing chopsticks into a bowl of rice and leaving them there (an act
of hostility among Chinese because it signifies death) would be laughed off
(nervously) by locals unless it was done with obvious intent.
4. A Canadian winemaker told
Chinese reporters in Shanghai that he expected his "ultra
premium" wine to do well in China because it had done well in Japan
and the two cultures had so much in common.
Resentment of Japan runs very deep in China.
5. A firm ordered expensive clocks to give as gifts commemorating the
closing of a deal. The firm's local staff caught the mistake: to "give
a clock" in Chinese sounds the same as "seeing someone off to his
end." 6. Giving umbrellas is taboo because doing so is homonymous
(same) with a phrase that means the person's family will be dispersed.
Books, too, are unlucky presents because "giving a book" sounds
the same as "delivering defeat."
7. Shanghai natives chuckle at Va Bene, an expensive Italian restaurant
that recently opened in town, because the Italian name meaning "it
goes well" sounds like Shanghainese for "not cheap."
8. One multinational company giving gifts from Tiffany replaced the white
ribbons on the famous jeweler's robin's-egg- blue boxes with red ribbons
after the company's Shanghai employees pointed out that white in China
signifies death, while red is lucky and is used for celebrations.
9. Avoid four, a homonym for death in Chinese, and load up on eights, a
number that is pronounced the same as "making money" in the
southern Cantonese dialect.
10.But even an experienced Sinologist like Mr. Clark was mystified when his
Beijing workers objected to pricing a product at 250 yuan. It turned out
that in northern China, calling someone "250" is to say the
person is nuts.
11. In the south, people tap two fingers on the table to say thanks, but
people in the north might think the gesture is just a nervous tic.
12. A person who has lost face, meanwhile, will often retaliate in
unexpected, often passive ways. "The
trigger doesn't have to be extreme," Mr. Seligman noted. "You can
contradict somebody in front of someone who is lower ranking and cause the
person to lose face. Even the simple act of saying no to somebody can make
that person lose face."
13. A reporter once made a gaffe by suggesting in a way intended to be
complimentary that a central government official across the table was
"probably too young to remember" some minor event in the past. In China, where age is revered, the
comment made the official and his entourage blanch (turn white), apparently
wondering whether it was a veiled insult suggesting the man was to junior
to warrant respect.
14. "Be modest in
demeanor. Listen well. Preach little," "Watch how others
do things and follow suit."
15. Mary Ann's
right foot rested on her left knee, and someone asked her to put it down.
Unknowingly she had insulted her fellow passengers by beaming the sole of
her shoe at them. The same scenario could have taken place in Singapore,
Egypt, Saudi Arabia or Thailand.
16. In Japan,
wearing a kimono if you are not Japanese is perfectly acceptable, but the
simple mistake of folding the right side over the left rather than the
other way around will bring smiles to local faces at the sight of a foreign
visitor decked out for burial.
17. In
Bulgaria, trying to get any kind of information can be maddening to an
American. People seem to tell you one thing and then do another until
you figure out that the head motions for "yes" and "no"
are exactly opposite to what we're used to in the United States.
18. The Chinese would say that Americans walk too fast, swing their arms
too much, and are far too expressive in their body movements and facial
expressions. Americans, when
not using their hands for emphasis, are rarely content to let them dangle
quietly at their sides. Yet, carrying on a conversation with your hands in
your pockets makes a poor impression in Belgium, France, Finland, Sweden
and Indonesia, while standing with your hands on your hips is a gesture of
defiance in Indonesia. In Fiji, talking with your arms crossed over your
chest is a sign of respect. Pointing is often a natural recourse when
communicating abroad, but in some countries using the index finger to do so
is impolite. The Chinese favor the open hand, Malaysians the thumb and
Indians the chin.
19.
Demonstrative folk should curb their natural tendency to touch in Oriental
cultures, where physical contact between acquaintances is considered
invasion of privacy and a sign of disrespect. Patting a child on the head
seems a harmless enough gesture at home, but in Thailand and Singapore it
is a grave offense, since the head is sacred. Reaching over someone's head
or across his or her chest to pass something to someone else is considered
impolite there. In China, if the person you're speaking with gazes around
the room or looks to one side, don't take offense; he or she is just being
polite.
20. Through
most of France, people usually kiss twice, once on each cheek, upon
greeting or leave-taking. In Belgium and Russia, however, they go in for
three kisses. In cultures where bowing is customary, follow your host's
head. In Japan, the longer and lower the bow, the more respect is shown; in
Thailand, the higher the hands are held customarily they're pressed
together at chest level the more respect is shown. Don't get carried
away and raise your hands above eye level, though, or you will insult
someone.
21. In China,
Singapore, Hong Kong and Taiwan, people appreciate compliments, but they
will always deny that they're true. Japanese etiquette encourages people to
beat around the bush in conversations; if you go into a store to buy a
kimono, talk about the weather first.
22. In some
foreign countries, admiring a specific item too enthusiastically may oblige
the host to give it to you. A visitor in Poland praised a friend's new set
of dishes and narrowly escaped having to take them home with her by saying,
"They're just too heavy thanks so much all the same."
23. Some of
the greatest cultural faux pas are made at the dinner table. In Norway,
Malaysia and Singapore, it's rude to leave anything on your plate, but in
Egypt, it's rude not to. If you finish a drink in Indonesia, it implies
you'd like another.
24. Some countries follow a "better never than late" philosophy;
others, "better late than punctual." Jamaicans appreciate
promptness, as do the Danes. In Denmark, if you are invited for dinner at 6
p.m., be on time because the food may already be on the table. If you're
fortunate enough to receive a rare invitation to dine in a Chinese home,
you should arrive promptly and leave soon after the end of the meal. In
Egypt, a pre-dinner snack is a good idea, because an evening meal there may
not begin until 10:30 or later.
25. Titles carry as much or more import as names in countries such as
Austria, Italy, Germany, England, Japan, Sri Lanka and Indonesia. In
Austria, when people ask, "How shall I call you," they don't want
to know your first name but your title.
26. In China,
Scandinavia and Eastern Europe, people relate formally, on a last-name
basis. In China, the last name is spoken first, followed by the
"first" name. For instance, Chen Yung Po would be Mr. Chen.
People in Thailand, Fiji and Israel call one another by their first names,
as they do in Iceland, where the telephone directory is alphabetized
according to first name. In Germany and Poland, switching from a last-name
to a first-name basis in a relationship is such an eventful passage that it
is often marked by clasping arms and downing a ceremonial drink.
27. Card swapping on first meeting, be it for business or pleasure, is
customary in Japan. Since titles are important in Japanese society, if you
have a professional title of any kind, make sure it appears on your card.
The large hotels in Japan can have cards printed in Japanese and English in
a day, and Japan Airlines provides the same service in the United States.
28. Flowers, a thoughtful and appropriate gift throughout
most of the world, can get you into trouble in some places. Red roses are
reserved for one's sweetheart in Eastern Europe. Chrysanthemums are
strictly a funeral flower in France, Italy and Hungary. Always give an odd
number of flowers in Czechoslovakia and Poland. Bouquets are taken only to
hospitals in China: they symbolize misfortune anywhere else.
29. The best remembrances are often small items for the home or mementos
from the region where you live. The
Japanese love status gifts that might include designer scarves and ties, as
well as key chains and leather items. American Indian turquoise jewelry is
also popular with the Japanese. In Hong Kong, clocks are bad omens. The
peoples of Indonesia, Thailand, Korea, Taiwan and Singapore to not open a
gift in the presence of the giver, so don't insist, no matter how much you
think it will be appreciated. You should give and receive gifts and other
items with the right hand in Nigeria, Korea, Malaysia and Saudi Arabia.
30. An American traveler extended her hand in thanks to a Bedouin (Arabian
nomad) potter who had shown her his work and then offered her a cup of tea.
The man had recently washed his hands in preparation for prayer and, in his
culture, it then was forbidden to have any physical contact with a woman.
But to acknowledge his visitor's gesture of friendship, he placed a grape
leaf between their palms and shook her hand warmly.
31. When you buy a Coke on
the street in Romania, you are only buying the liquid; you actually have to
stand there while drinking and then promptly return the bottle!
32. My friend and I sat down for a beer and were discussing cars. I (used
to) have a pet name for car enthusiasts -- car nazis. As Jim and I were
talking, I blurted out something to this effect: "Well, Jim, I may not
be a car nazi, but I do know this about carburetors..." The bar became extremely quiet. Jim
wisely told me..."Vance, you don't say things like that in a bar in
the country that brought you Adolph Hitler". Nazi is rarely used
lightly even in English, but clearly in Austria, the word is a no-no.
Top Ten International Faux Pas
What’s common practice in one area of the world may be absolutely taboo
in another. Because of the great variety of customs, cultures and
traditions, it’s almost impossible to list specific acts that you should
-- or shouldn’t -- avoid.
1. Making assumptions
“Where can I get a good cup of ‘American’ coffee?”
Assuming things are the same as at home
Assuming you understand why things are different
2.
Neglecting to develop relationships
“Just sign the contract, I'm in a hurry!”
Trying to do business before developing a relationship
Acting too informally
Coming on too fast or too strong
3.
Comparing the place you are visiting to your home
“Oh, it’s OK, but it doesn't hold a candle to the Grand Canyon!”
Comparing customs
Comparing the quality of goods or services
Comparing business practices
4.
Talking about money
“I could get this at home for half the price!”
Talking about how cheap or expensive something is
Talking about how much money someone makes
5.
Misinterpreting body language
“Everyone loves a big smile.”
Standing too close (or too far away)
Smiling (or not smiling)
Bowing (or not bowing)
Making eye contact (or not making eye contact)
Slouching
6.
Doing improper things with your feet
“I’ll slip my shoes off and get comfortable.”
Touching your feet or footwear
Showing the soles of your feet
Moving an object or pointing with your feet
7.
Doing improper things with your hands
“I know they'd like a little hug.”
Touching someone
Holding (or not holding) hands
Shaking hands with a glove on or with your hand in your pocket
Using the incorrect (usually the left) hand for a particular act
Touching an inappropriate part of your body
8.
Wearing improper attire
“Casual? I guess I’ll wear my T-shirt, tennis shoes and baseball
cap.”
Dressing sloppily or too informally
Dressing immodestly
Trying to “go native”
9.
Using names incorrectly
“Just call me Bill!”
Using first names
Neglecting to use a title (or using a lower title than is appropriate)
Mispronouncing a name
Misspelling a name
Calling someone by the wrong name
10.Neglecting
to follow the appropriate dining and etiquette
“No, thanks, I’m on a diet.”
Exhibiting improper table manners
Eating in public
Showing displeasure with food or drink
Declining an offer of food or drink
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